i woke up early this morning like every other morning. but this morning felt different and i haven’t felt okay ever since last friday. i didn’t wake up feeling lonely and depress. i didn’t wake up thinking and over thinking. i just woke feeling okay.
to be honest, the past weekend i felt like shit. i didn’t want to do anything. i didn’t even want to work. i just want to lay in bed and talk to panda. but panda didn’t respond back or return my call. and that’s why i felt like shit. i just wanted to drink so i won’t think, so i won’t feel like shit, so i won’t wait for is texts, and it did work but the next day i begin to think again and later that night i starts drinking again. three days straight and i never drink when i’m depress or stress all i do is just lay in bed and waste my life away.
but today, my mood changed. maybe i needed to be depress to get over things. maybe i did needed to be weak to be strong later on and i guess its working. so i’m not going to have my phone with me all the time now like i uses to because i know for a fact that i will never see his text again.
No comments:
Post a Comment